Hello world, you are looking quite sunny today! Reporting from southern California the sun glazes down on me shining my computer screen up with happiness and joy. :) Okay so I have tons of homework and seemly at this moment in my life, my world is falling apart, but at this particular moment I am happier than I can possibly be. Is it because I am near one of my best friends who is enjoying this study time with me or is because I am at the best spot in the library by a sunny window looking out over the baseball diamond? Either way it still makes me happy and I am glad that I can have the opportunity to get away from my family (in my own car might I add! :) for the rest of the day. Man, there are some weird people here. Some guy is looking at really gross pictures on the Internet, in the public library...yeah so this is awkward. I am basically just procrastinating writing three essays for World History. That should be FUN!! Okay so it is completely my fault that I even have to write them right now as we were assigned these essays two months ago. Oh well. What can I say? I am a whacked out teenager writing to you from a very whacked out place. I live in Camazotz filled with mindless people going through mindless activities that they have no interest in. Students surround me studying and working hard in subjects that they despise yet decided to take. Sure Math, Science, English, History are all required subjects, but if you truly despise 6th period Aquatics why the heck are you taking that class? This is completely an assumption, but MOST and I say MOST NOT ALL people glide through life not really thinking or caring about what they are doing. I love World History provided that I don't have a lot of work, but it doesn't mean that I still don't LOVE it. It makes me happy to come to class everyday seeing my crazily wonderful teacher jumping for joy. Teachers that really care about what they are doing and their students are the best teachers in the world. I love my teacher because of the way he makes every student no matter how good of student feel like they are great just being themselves. If we all died tomorrow (which I hope we don't) I hope that he would truly know how much of influence he has had on my life and my decisions this past year. Without him I don't know if I would even liked history let alone feel happy coming to class everyday, most importantly I won't feel like I belonged. These kind of people make me believe that there is still hope for humanity. Oh a much sadder note, I want to pray for everyone in Boston and across the world that are suffering for what happened today. Today during a marathon, two explosions went off in Boston killing and injuring many. Please pray for everyone affected by this tragic event. All we can do is push through the tough stuff in order to get to the shining light at the end of the tunnel. Take care everyone. I hope that everyone is having an amazing day that is filled with happiness.
There was a time my world was filled with darkness, but today it is all filled with sunshine.
So it has definitely been awhile since I have posted anything. Nothing really new with me going on, I am still in high school which sucks and I am still working through life. I post things not so I get followers or even views, basically I just use this as my outlet to vent about my life. Do you like my picture? I thought it was very funny and good for the kind of mood I am in right now. Today is Saturday and basically I was supposed to work on homework and knowing me I was lazy and watched Youtube videos instead of actually doing anything. Fast forward four hours and my parents are super mad at me because I was actually supposed to get something done today. Opps. I don't even get why they care like I was actually going to do anything anyways. They are like, "You need to focus more on school!!" Yell...Yell..Yell.. and blah and blah. Yeah I kind of like to zone out in those kind of conversations. I know I suck, can I go back to my room to do nothing? Or and they like, "You need to stop focusing on yourself and stop being so spoiled!!" Okay first off I am a teenager, that is kind of all I think about and secondly aren't you the ones who spoiled me in the first place? Yeah, I know it is kind of mean, but seriously I just hate it the way they control my life. They tell me what to do and how I should do it. They had all of these great plans for me when I was born and think that when I somehow didn't turn out as smart or wonderful as they hoped those dreams disappeared. I am sorry for being the way I am, okay? The worst part is all of the idiots at school feel like it is "their duty" to friggin tell me who I should be. I told my English teacher that I couldn't do IB (a really hard course) because it would kill me and she told me that I actually could do it, but I am just a stresser. Okay, first off you don't know me so don't make assumptions about me. Next I NEVER friggin asked for your opinion!! Oh and my so my math teacher also assumes that I wanted to know that he believes that I have low confidence. That is so wonderful, I am so glad that you told me that... I know that I don't hate my parents, but sometimes they can just get on my case for no reason. Like earlier they were all like, "What is wrong?" Oh like suddenly I would friggin know what is wrong with me. I have no idea.. Honestly, I wished I did. Nothing especially bad happened to me in fact I am pretty sure I only talked to like one person besides my family members, but for no reason I felt like I was going to kill myself. I know that would never happen, but sometimes I can really sad. I wish for my life to be different, but I guess I just keep having a positive outlook on life or pretending that I do. My parents can't believe that I feel sorry for myself and they think that I am pathetic for sitting in my room wishing for a better life as I live a pretty good life. I am not complaining by any means. I have two loving parents, a roof over my head, a computer, expensive things, clothes, food on the table, a car, etc. For the most part I have everything that I have ever wanted, but there is still something missing. I want to go to a Third World country so that I can try to help people as that is what really makes me happy. I help people now, but I want to do so much more than just the simple things that I do around school and my community. More things to vent about? Hmm... people suck. Let's talk about the stupid people at my school who flip their hair and they they are the hottest people on the planet. Oh yeah, everyone LOVES those people. I live in the southern California area and people are so stupid. I was walking around my neighborhood, just spending a minute by myself and these little kids probably in middle school were just staring at me with their mouths open. I asked them if they had ever seen a person walk before and they just continued to talk among themselves wondering who I was. Okay so maybe I don't go out around my neighborhood much, but still it was almost like I wasn't even there. Like they were behind a glass window that I couldn't see or hear them through. Whatever, I just told them to buzz off. The sad part is that those same kids will go to high school and into life torturing people like me that friggin hate them. I don't hate kids, in fact I love babysitting and hanging out with little kids, but people can be especially stupid here. I hate it here and always have if you read my very first blog posts. Oh the worst part is all of the people that act like my friends are completely fake. Oh like they honestly mean that they like your outfit, that is cute. They only CARE ABOUT THEMSELVES!!! They want you to say that they look wonderful and how beautiful they are. They need YOU to make them feel like they are special. They don't actually care about you. I have had people flat out say they hate me, but somehow the fact that they pretend to like me is way worst that if they just go out and say it. Anyways I think I am pretty much out of things to vent about. I hope whoever is reading this has a wonderful day. :) Unless you are a stupid person from school, because then you can buzz off. More to come next time :)
